Oh Boy! Oh Boy! Oh Boy! I really liked my blog today! I hope hundreds of people read it! I am so proud of my quick wit and my use of satire– Big Bird in need of a resume! Venture capitalists and drilling for oil! Ha! I am not anti-Republican, but come on, how much money did Romney make while employed by Bain? How many American jobs were lost? How many jobs were sent to China? Furthermore, what did he say about drilling for oil and natural gas on public lands? Surely, he would want to drill in the parks of Sesame Street.
Fracking, fracking, we need to start fracking.
Uh-oh. Was it too cliché to make Big Bird search for a job as a preschool teacher? Am I insulting my reader by making his job quest so obvious? Darn it! Maybe I should have thought outside of the box, maybe that would get my post more hits, more likes, and a comment or two. Thinking of that, I’m jealous of the bloggers who get like after like after like, and comment after comment after comment. I have been writing my heart out since January 7, and the most likes I have for one post is 22.
Is it because I write too much? I read other people’s long stories, and I always make sure to like or comment. I want writers to know I was visiting, I heard what they had to say, and I want to thank them for letting me into their world for a few minutes.
Maybe, maybe I do not get likes and comments because what I write is rubbish. Let’s face it, I am all over the board. I am not a foodie. I am not a news reporter. I am not a traveller. I am not a photographer. I am not a poet. I am a writer without an audience because in the last 276 days, I have been all of these personas at least once, but I am not one type of writer. I have even tried to write a few controversial posts, thinking that someone would disagree with my opinion and want to argue with me. Nope. I am stuck with being mediocre– few likes here, a couple of comments there.
Let’s cut to the chase, what I want is validation. I’ll admit it. I write to be acknowledged. My self-esteem ebbs and flows with the hits and likes and comments I receive from this blog. What will I feel in 90 days when my experiment is over?
I might need to switch to Xanax.
Getting back to Big Bird, I should have thought about him as a 49-year-old bird in need of health insurance and a 401K. He has too many years before he is able to collect Social Security, and we all know that we as a nation have been threatened for the last twenty years that Social Security might not even exist when we are all ready to retire. He needs a corporate job– he needs a high paying job with benefits and a guaranteed 401K.
I should have had him looking for a job in the corporate world as a motivational speaker. Just think of it! That bird can make a snail feel good about being slow! Surely, in a room full of forty-somethings who are questioning their life’s’ worth, Big Bird could make them feel existentially secure in a way that Tony Robbins and Zig Ziglar could never do. These middle-aged listeners would be wooed into a false sense of bravado. Big Bird could remind them the same lessons that never fail, the same lessons he taught them in 1972: keep trying and never give up; be proud of who you are; believe in yourself. Big Bird could sell out theaters all over the country, and the corporation who hired him would make bank off of every appearance.
Yep, if I would have written Big Bird’s cover letter differently, maybe then, just maybe, I would have gotten the validation that I yearn to receive.
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